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Thursday, September 30, 2010

I have a secret I wanted to share... I am a vampire

My name is Lexxie I have held in a secret for a long time that I can no longer keep.  Something is wrong with me, seriously wrong with me, and has been for about 4 years now.  I crave blood.  I must have it, or I think I will die.  I don't know what would happen if I didn't drink blood, because I have never gone without it since this started.  I must feed about once a week, but sometimes I feed more than that.  It depends on the day, and my mood.  I'm 17, and attend the local high school.  No one has any idea, not any of my classmates, my teachers, my parents, no one.  Not a soul.  I have to get this off my chest, I want to tell you about my life.

It's been four days since I last had a drink, but I can feel my body already starting to crave it.  I feel week and my skin feels numb.  The whites of my eyes are turning yellow and my shiny ginger hair has lost is luster.  I am already planning out my next victim.  His name is Micheal Henderson, and he lives in the next town over (I am hesitant to reveal my location for now).  He is 32 years old, with balding brown hair and slightly overweight.  He is a teacher who used to teach biology at my school, in fact I had him.  Last year he got fired because he apparently having relations with one of my classmates, this boy named Jacob.  Jacob is one of the smaller boys in my class, he has thick binocular glasses and mousy hair.  No one ever really paid him much attention until this happened.  Personally, I didn't even know of his existence until the incident.  I found out because one day I went to my bio class and we had a new teacher.  The new guy was hesitant at first to tell us why Mr. Henderson was gone, but eventually he let it slip that there had been an incident with another student.  He didn't say what.  We all found out when we got a letter in homeroom the next day, explaining that a certain biology teacher named Mr. Henderson was caught performing certain (yet unspecified) sexual acts on one of our classmates.  It asked for anyone else to come forward who knew anything, implying, of course, for other victims to come forward.  No one did.  No one wants to own up to something like that.

At first no one knew who the lucky student was, but people soon began to suspect when they noticed Jacob had been gone from his classes.  Of course, it took them a while because not too many people even knew there was a Jacob, and that he happened to be in their class to be missing.  I guess it must have been lab day, or some activity where he would have been forced to interact when someone first noticed he was gone.  Apparently students started asking their teachers, and the teachers gave them vague responses, telling them Jacob would be out of school for a few weeks.  Because the teachers did not specify and were being so evasive, everyone figured it out.  Outwardly, all of my peers pretended it was terrible and shocking, but inwardly, in each inner click, everyone laughed.  This big, disgusting middle aged man, who was probably the only person to talk to Jacob ever, was doin the dirty with him?  Why Jacob?  Couldn't he have picked one of the hotter boys, if he really had a thing for dudes?  Of course not, they would have told, it had to be Jacob, that quiet invisible loser.  I most certainly laughed right along with them, and internally I did, of course, find it funny, but at the same time it made me cringe and I secretly wanted to befriend this kid I had never talked to, because I wasn't very popular either (I'll get to that another day) and I had my own dark secrets.

Okay, so back to my bloodlust.  Why did I choose this man?  Because he did a horrible thing to my peer?  Of course not!  Let's be real here.  The reason is he is a loner, and since he now has no job (no one will employ him) no one will miss him when he's gone.  Of course, the police are going to notice something is amiss because he does have to go to court, but this is a good thing.  They're going to think two things
1. He ran away because he wanted to evade the stigma of a pedophile and potential (certain) jail time.  (He's lucky he is out on bail right now).
2.  Even if he is dead, they are going to be happy because everyone in society hates pedophiles.  And if they don't know he is dead, they are going to be just happy he is gone from the community never to return.

I want to let you guys know that this is in no way my first victim, and nor will he be my last.  I just feel that since I am starting with today as my first entry, I must tell you what I am doing right now, and that is this victim.
When I mark a victim I usually go through the following steps.
1. I make a decision.  There are usually loads of good victims that week, or sometimes there are none.  It changes from day to day, week to week and month to month.  
2.  Stalking.  I will follow the victim (not too closely as I am much too lazy for that) and learn their schedule, where they work, and when is the best time for attack.
3.  Planning.  There isn't usually much involved here other than I get on my gloves and figure out a way to sneak out of the house or convince my parents that I am going somewhere and not to worry about me.  Then I get in my car and go.  I also acquire whatever tools necessary to do break ins and what not.  Often it is nothing more than a baseball bat, and usually not even that because I am excellent at picking locks, or finding an unlocked window or whatever I can fit into.  Usually not a lot of prep.
4.The attack.  Here, I find my person.  I creep up on them, and bite their necks.  This is an instant immobilization.  I just get their jugular for the instant injection of whatever it is that makes them stop moving.  Then I just suck and suck and suck until I am satisfied.  They die within a few minutes.  I do not like the blood after they die, it is stale and no good.
5.  The escape.  This usually just consists of me getting in my car and leaving.  Of course, on the way there and back I use back roads and follow all traffic rules to ensure not getting pulled over and suspected.

On a final note for the night, I just wanted to talk about what I gain from the whole thing.  I mean, of course I feel full, like I just had a giant feast, but I feel the most interesting part is the emotional aspect of the whole ordeal.  It is interesting to feel a persons pulse as they expire.  At first their heart will beat really fast will all the adrenaline pumping through their systems, but after a while, it faints to a bare murmur.  Their breathing goes from strong and confident, till you start to hear them make this obnoxious rattling noise and it slows down.  Their eyes close.  Also, I can feel them.  Sometimes I get memories from the person's life, other times, I get emotions, thoughts, ideas about the world and their philosophy on life.  It has taught me a lot, and I do not regret it.

Regards,
Lexxie